mercredi, février 10, 2010

Farewell to Gribi

Gribi has gone to the Otherworld.

As I am writing this, I am sitting in an Internet Cafe in Basel.

On the journey to Basel on monday, the car started to have a sort of a "tremor" and made a real nasty noise. So when I finally arrived, I decided not to depart again before a mechanic had a look at it. I called one and he said he could come on wednesday. (today). Since we couldn't let the cats alone this long, my mom went home by train.

Before she traveleld off, we had a long talk about Gribi. He went worse the past last days and the medics didn't barley help anymore. Therfore, we finally decided that she would call the Veterinarian once at home. A hard decision after the years now we took intensice care of him.

This morning, she called me to say that the Vet was at home and Gribi had a peaceful trespassing after a quiet morning.

I know it was for the best, still, it hurts beyond any description. I also feel like a coward because I was not there, at his side. I was present when he was born, but not when he left. But I was with him in my mind and my heart. I layed on the bed and cried all the time. It is so extremly hard. Gribi was with us for 17 years. Always friendly, always kind and calm. I wish so much I could hold him in my arms at least one more time.

But I know that we were lucky, already. In November 2008 He didn't come home from a trip outside and was missed for several days. I knew then that something bad  happened and had the pain not only of the loss but also from that awful feeling that I would never know what happened to him and if maybe, he was in distress and would need help.
Then one night, he was at the window. It was like a miracle! a second chance. Since then, we lived with "borrowed" time.
And now, at least I know where he his and that he had a peaceful leaving. Therefore, I know we were blessed by the fact that obviously, Gods thought that the first Loss in November 2009 was too cruel. So I try to see that blessing.
Now, I will have to shed all the tears that have to be shed and bear the pain. Then I will have to find the way back into life. Life was very much under the assignment of Gribi-care all the past months. I am physically and psychically exhaust. The thought of a life without looking for Gribi as first Duty after getting off the bed and as the last before getting in, is strange to me. Also will I have to find more time for the other cats that were left pretty  much behind during all this time. Except from Pico, they are all not really young anymore. It is important that we share the time that we have together.

Gribi - you were one my best friends I ever had. I love you so very much. 

8 commentaires:

Bodecea a dit…

*drück dich*

Weidenfrau a dit…

fühl dich umarmt...

caroona a dit…

Ich nehme Dich auch mal in den Arm. *seufz*

Sefarina a dit…

Das tut mir leid, fühl dich von mir gedrückt...

Diana Kennedy a dit…

Danke Euch allen. Es ist wirklich sehr schwer im Moment

Geier a dit…

Mein aufrichtiges Mitgefühl.

Mauser*Girl a dit…

I'm so sorry for your loss.

As you know, I've lost two cats in the past two years, so I definitely know how hard it is. My little Maus was one I raised from a little kitten - it's so much harder when you've spent so much time raising and loving them.

Diana Kennedy a dit…

@Geier: Vielen Dank. Ich weiss das zu schätzen.

@Mauser*Girl, Yes I know how much you suffered from the loss of Maus. It made me cry when I read your blog about his end.