dimanche, décembre 04, 2011

Movies stereotypes

I had some time to spare and took fun into collecting a few stereotypes that appears to exist in the movies. Not in ALL movies of course, but in several.


* A Pet either dies in the first ten minutes of the film  - or never. No matter in how deep a trouble it gets, it will return safe to its owner at the end. Same applies for Kids.
* Dogs are more likely to get killed than cats. Exception is for cats owned by lone, vulnerable Ladies who are stalked by a weirdo. Stalker will never miss to kill the cat.
* Whereas the horse in real life takes every opportunity to pull down its head and catch a bit of food, Horses in Westerns never seem to be hungry. Even after a long ride, they just stand still when the rider dismount. 
* Deer will willingly appear as soon as someone decides to go hunting.
* In German Films, Horse-Farms are owned by a good looking but broke woman in need for a hero to save them from a reckless Capitalist who wants to transform the farm into a casino or such.
* Most dogs in Film are extremely smart. They  know who the murderer is long before anybody else does. 
* Cats throw out shrill fighting screams, even if they just trott along the road or jump down from somewhere. Probaly because they love to scare the shit out of you.
* Save an old nag from slaugther and it will win the next race for you!
* Snakes will always try to bite you.


* Children in Film either have the mental abilities of  furniture and just look dumb when someone talks to them or they happen to be some sort of miniature, know-it-all adults. Both versions can be extremly annoying.
* There are more autistic kids in film than in reality and each one has a particular gift.


*In Film, no obese person appears without her or his overweight being mentionned in some way, or even is part of the plot.
* A fat man may get a thin, good looking woman as wife, if he happens to be a nice guy. But no fat woman will ever get a thin, good looking man -  no matter how smart or nice she is. 
If she does, then i'ts because the man in question wants a  green card or uses her for his dark plans. 
* Thin people in Film can eat Pizas, Chocolate and Burgers every day and never get fat, if they happen to be the main characters.

ETHNICS (applies mostly to US Films)

* Every German is either a Nazi, has a Nazi past or is otherwise related to a Nazi. If not, he sells weapons or chemical warfare supplies. 
* Every Arab is a terrorist. If not, his son or cousin is.
* Every black man in a mixed crew can be sure to be the one who's killed first.
* Jews are always innocent. 
* Latinos are always drug-dealing firearm-freaks.


* A car will keep on rolling, even if it has to crash trough a solid fence, hit whatever hard obstacle and is burning.
* Every driver fits any car, no need for nobody to adjust the seat.
* No one ever gets killed or at least injured at highway-chases.
* Every car will have a starting problem when a monster or a mad killer is outside.
* No persecuted person ever properly locks the car when leaving it, even tough the back seat is the favorite hiding place for any killer. 


* I'm ashamed I can't hack me into the Pentagon-System. According to Films, its really no big deal to do so.
* In Film, you can google about any tiny little incident that happened somewhere in time and space and you will find all the Info you need.
* Zoom in any bitmap-Picture and you will end up with nothing than big, square Pixels. In Movies, they have experts who can transform these Pixels into sharp details that weren't there before.
* In older films, whole NASA-Programs fit on a floppy-disk.


* Women whose husbands have a dangerous job will leave them, because they  "too much fear to loose him". - This doesn't make the slightest sense, but well...
* A main male character will have a boring, troublesome wife who's always making a big fuzz over the tiniest little shit. But he will always be patient and stand at her side.
* Teenage Girls are dumb, aggressive bitches who toroughly hate their parents and can't wait to take drugs or rob a service station.
* Unless it's the subject of the story, no man will ever leave his wife. Woman will drop the man. 
* Lesbians are sexy but evil.
* Gays will kill their Lovers if they dare to cheat them.


* Whereas Smokers are in the minority nowadays, there isn't such a thing as a non-smoker in German Films.
* If two persons meet in restaurant for dining, they never will finish their repast. One will jump out and leave the place in anger, long before food is even served.
* No man will ever drink his cofffe other than "black without sugar".
* A jobless actress can still afford a beautiful house in LA.

Any addition to the list? 

4 commentaires:

Bodecea a dit…

Ah, so viel getippt und dann hat es google gefressen...noch mal kurz...

- betreff Gender - Bechdel-test! http://bechdeltest.com/statistics/

- Eine Frau will Sex & ergreift die Initiative = sie ist böse/mit ihr passiert was Böses

- Monster kommt - wir teilen uns in kleine Gruppen auf

- Brille auf und Haare verwuschelt - Superheld bleibt unerkannt.

- Brille ab und Haare verwuschelt - hässliche Frau ist schön

Usw... ;-)

Geier a dit…

Farbige Sidekicks sind idR drollige Dauerquassler.
Kinder bringen sich (trotz Warnung) immer in Gefahr und müssen gerettet weden.
Dicke sind fröhliche Kumpel.
Bösewichter sind (mittlerweile) Raucher, die Guten natürlich nicht!

Feronia a dit…

This is hilarious, Diana - I love it! It's true that a jobless actress will always have a beautiful house and she will always have beautiful clothes and a brand new car too. And all women really, deep down, just want to be 'beautiful'. Every arty, unusual woman in a film is just waiting for a 'makeover' which will 'change her life' and get her the guy.

Diana Kennedy a dit…

@Bodecea: Wuah, ich hasse das, wenn einem ein langer Text verloren geht. Ja, warum sich die Leute bei Monsteralarm immer in kleine Grupen aufteilen ist witzig - Dabei wäre man doch je stärker, je mehr man ist.

@Geier: Ja, wobei in deutschen Filmen rauchen gefühlt doch so gut wie alle. Die unartigen Bälger die sich dauernd in Gefahr bringen sind extrem nervig. Da hat man Mühe, sich überhaupt mit dem Wunsch zu identifizieen, sie mögen gerettet werden.

@Feronia: Yes, Despite of what it seems, The image and role of women didn't really change.